“Kiss of Love” Protest – Has India really come of age to embrace it?

Recent media reports, National newspapers and TV channels have been flooded with headlines of Indian youth organizing a protest so called “Kiss Fest” or “Kiss of love” across major cities of country to show their angst against Moral Policing by publicly kissing and hugging each other.

I really felt the strong sensation of understanding and analyzing this burning issue and its underlying cause and emotions. At first, we need to understand what “Moral Police” is!

According to Wikipedia, It is basically name given to vigilante groups which act to enforce a code of morality in India. They claim that their actions are to “protect Indian culture”. They attack anything that does not conform to their notion of purity and morality, including paintings, books, films and theaters, art exhibitions, pubs and other liquor retailers, beauty salons, and people who they deem to be embracing Western attitudes and clothing.

So recent acts of violence against youth caught in so called immoral acts by Moral Police led to the organization of “Kiss of love” campaign by Kochi based youth. The sole intention of this protest was to raise voice against mounting incidents of crimes by so called Religious and Political outfits which often includes thrashing and indecent punishments.

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Our Indian culture and society has earmarked what’s acceptable and what’s NOT based on Izzat, sharm and Hayaa! As Indian youth, it’s also expected from us to follow our social norms and cultural sentiments which in my opinion is not bad. After all these cultural values are the ones which uniquely defines us in this world. But the BIG question is we follow it to what extent?  Today’s Indian youth is born and brought up with the most twisted psychology, dangling between Indian traditions taught by parents and the western adopted cool lifestyle as observed around us. With the heavy influence of western world on Indians, it has taught us that it’s our Right to Free Expression and so showing affection in public isn’t bad at all. But conflicts arises when people with extreme mentality co-exists!

Thus it necessitates the understanding of this issue’s legality. Section 294(a) of Indian Penal Code states that “Whoever, to the annoyance of others, does any obscene act in any public place shall be punished with imprisonment for a term which may extend to three months, or with fine, or with both”. However the meaning of the word ‘obscene’ is not given in IPC, hence it is interpreted differently by different authorities. But, with regards to kissing and hugging in public places, the Supreme Court of India has made it clear that ‘no case can be made out’ of two people con-sensually hugging and/or kissing. I further feel that IPC needs to be clear on each and every scenario arising in society so as to avoid any conflicts based solely on moral grounds.

Also, there can be no justification to crime of any nature whatsoever. So it’s high time that we pass strict laws against crimes done in the name of Moral Policing as it has been observed that these people are not saviors of Indian culture but just another bunch of people born and bred out of sick mentality of harming others. Thus, embracing protests like Kiss fest was necessary but wasn’t that we wished for.

Time has come when Indians at individual level need to understand that how much do they want to get influenced by Western world and also blending it with Indian flavor keeping in mind its legal and social ramifications. That’s the possible solution to ‘Modern’ and liberal Indian society.

As Indian culture never taught us that “It’s OK to Piss in public but Not Kiss in public”!! We must let people do what they want as long as it does not hurt the other sentiments. It is up to the individual to decide what is wrong and what is right. We are not here to judge all the people.

I just hope that Indian youth takes positive influence from other societies rising above such bitter conflicts in order to build a powerful nation with hitherto untapped potential.

©TARANG JAIN

Δ (My Life) – From Away To Back Home!!!

My recently concluded 12 day trip to Pune and around was quite a rejuvenation and mentally relaxing for me. Although, I was constantly cursed and reminded by my friends and colleagues about how lucky I was pulling off such long leaves. Even then, 12 days felt passing like the sand flowing from a clinched fist. That’s the place where I had spent most nourishing and enriching 2 years of my life working there. That’s the reason I keep going back there whenever I could. There must be some underlying feel good factor about it or a cause that allowed me to re think about why I moved out of Pune 14 months back in very first place.

Hmmm…. Let’s see that….

It had been a year this July since I moved back to Delhi from Pune for a greater good. My Parents were all that I could think of. I felt that it was a high time that I should put my responsibilities for them ahead of my career growth and take care of their already flailing health. Plus it would mean my well care to by my parents. Hence, I moved Back!!! 🙂

Within few weeks of  resuming work in Delhi/NCR (for same IT company…just took a transfer!), I had few realizations of my own regarding what my life has in store for me and how my career path would supposedly move ahead. All I had heard was that it isn’t gonna be easy. So I thought I would be prepared for it…I guess I was intuitive about it! :-/

Being practical and putting up all stats in my mind I analysed what Delhi has to offer: It has my family and loads of relatives; which obviously are my support centers and are indispensable. Secondly, it has the home advantage. I belong to that place. I have my roots in Delhi. Of course everyone ultimately wants to return home. That’s the dream, right??  Moreover, I have my friends in here, be it school guys or college friends and all other who are friends for all other random reasons which even I don’t remember. 😉

But being in Delhi, I have my own qualms. Life has changed completely. I mean literally!                  

Living in one of the most populous areas, constantly surrounded by walloping crowd snatches the peace away from life completely. 13 hours away from home for work leaves no space for any other    self -indulging activity and has rendered social life practically non-existent. Seriously, who wants to spend 4 hours daily of this busy life just travelling and being stuck in horrendous traffic jams!

All my day is spent dealing with mean and difficult people. When I come home I like it to be empty. The presence of others in my house kind of annoys me. I love coming home and shutting the doors. I feel brain dead. I’m relatively available, but not to live with.

Be it relatives or old friends, I haven’t met most of them ever since I have moved here permanently. Good were times when I used to be on home visit, had a craze for meeting these people coz u miss them and so do they. All that charm of meeting seem to have lost now.

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On the other hand life was easy out there (in other cities with IT’s presence). Everyone has ample growth opportunities in career at other places as compared to Delhi. I personally find people less aggressive and more happy-go-lucky back there. Social life is well developed and flourishing as people don’t live far away from work and spend ample time getting to know each other. Mostly people are bachelors or recently settled in new cities and hence are more open for experiments in life. Plus good weather and whole bouquet of places to visit around makes these cities (e.g. Pune, Bangalore etc.) even more desirable to settle in.

As they rightly say : “Home is where the Heart is!!!”

I still wonder how it would be to have a good and satisfying career along with parents living in serenity and peace.  Looks like a distant dream as of now. But who knows what life has in store for us…so just living and keeping hopes intact till then. O:)

 

PEACE \/

 

©TARANG JAIN

The Art of Enjoying Being Single!!

Have you been Single lately or have fallen apart in your relationship recently or just happen to be born-Single? For some of us young, being single is just our way of life and are very comfortable living with it, for some of us it is just the only option and have learned to live that way…for rest of them it’s just a passing phase that might not even persist longer or consistent.

If you think being single is a curse and LnL(Loner n Loser) way of living then you seriously need to introspect your mentality. Love isn’t planned, it just happens.

Based on some personal experiences and interesting live examples of people around me I have notched up few ideas on how and what needs to be done when you’re Single…specially for Chanced-upon Singles…

Here is the list of things which could be done when you’re Single:

1)     Being single isn’t end of life, it’s just a way of life!!

Many people choose to remain single. That clearly means that they love their freedom more than a person. You are just not in a committed relation which clearly doesn’t mean you’re alone. Now that may be terrifying at first, but it is also liberating. You are the king and you make your own decisions.

 

2)    Don’t squander over the people in the past, there’s always a fresh set out there!

Sometimes new people gives a fresh perspective and broader sense of living life. It’s easy to sulk and feel isolated when you don’t have that special someone in your life. But don’t just stop there. Talk to people at your workplace, in your neighborhood, at the gym, etc. It is a great way to socialize with no pressure. It’s not just about finding someone new, rather it’s a chance to become a more social, engaging person.

 

3)    Old is gold! Never forget your old buddies!!

Most of us commit this very common mistake of letting our old buddies go just for the sake of committed relationships. And when these relationships end miserably or amicably we feel the dire need of trustworthy shoulders to cry on, which we had left behind far ago. So, even if now you’re single, reconnect with old friends and create a meaningful, lasting connection that can continue no matter what your relationship status points at. Don’t use friends as a crutch to fill the void of your lost relationship. Make them part of your life and happiness. Long lasting relation would develop by default.

4)    Feeling Lazy? …follow fitness regime and sports!

Probably handling relationship was toughest exercise for you to ignore your own health! Now that you are single, it’s the best time to get in shape and be ready to play next big innings! Probably a longer one too! 😉 . Achieving fitness isn’t always about hitting the gym and hard workouts, following a sports routine or fitness regime to get the shape you always wanted for yourself.

5)    Bring out the maverick in you..Explore!!

It’s time to explore the things or places or people you haven’t had a chance to explore yet. It is good to take a trip with friends or even by yourself. There is no better way to find yourself, seek new avenues and clear your head. So leave the pictures of the ex at home and head out for some adventure.

6)    Hit the dance floor or Go on a Movie Marathon!!

When you’re single, you are the official DJ of your life. You control what you listen to, how loud you’re listening to it and whether or not you’re going to play the kind of embarrassing crap you deny knowing anything about in public.

Bored of sitting hours on movie dates and spending loads of bucks on it? It’s time to break free from those shackles of drama, all you need is your HD full of stuff you love to watch and a laptop, Trust me you’ll never have to leave your couch for hours of quality entertainment!

It’s your life make it large!!

7)     Try on some flirting!!

Come on! You are single, you are eligible and you’ve got a licence to kill! 😀

Even if you’re not the type who would throw themselves at a potential match but sometimes it’s just nice to get your flirt on!  A pretty co-worker who noticed how handsome you look in pair of jeans and white shirt or an online date who happens to have crush on you but you never responded earlier. When you’re single, you’re free to respond to these little opportunities you might feel guilty about if you’re attached.

8)    Pamper yourself!!

Time’s over for budget crunches and managing the spending for two people. It’s time to be selfish now! Although you need to make more responsible decisions with your money while in the company of others. But right now, splurge on whatever you have wished for in future. Be it a shopping trip, a new gadget or a nicer car, now’s the time to go for it!

 

©TARANG JAIN

Karma and Soul bondage….The Jainism Way!!!


When karma attaches to the soul, its bondage to the soul is explained in the following four forms ✿

Prakriti Bandha (Type of karma):

When karmic matter attaches to the soul, it obscures soul’s essential nature of perfect knowledge, perfect vision, perfect conduct, unobstructed bliss, unlimited energy, eternal existence, equality and formlessness. The different types of karma obscure different quality or attributes of soul. This is known as Prakriti bandha.

Ghäti karma and Aghäti karma:

Prakriti bandha is classified into eight categories, according to the particular attribute of the soul that it obscures. These eight categories of karma are grouped into two major groups, known as Ghäti karma, which subdues the qualities of the soul, and Aghäti karma, which relates to physical body of the living beings and does not defile the qualities of the soul.

When a person destroys all of his Ghäti karmas, he attains Keval-jnäna (absolute knowledge). At that time he/she is known as Arihant or Sämanya (simple) Kevali. However, he/she continues to live his/her human life until all his/her Äghäti karmas are destroyed. He/she attains liberation or Nirvän only after äall the Äghäti karmas are destroyed.

Arihants establish the religious order of Sädhu (monks), Sädhvi (nuns), Shrävaka, (male laypersons), and Shrävikä (female laypersons). These Arihants are called Tirthankaras and the religious order is known as four fold Jain order or Sangh. Sämanya Kevalis do not establish the religious order but remain as a part of the existing order. At the end of that life,ä both Tirthankaras and simple Kevalis attain Nirvän and become Siddhas.

All Siddhas are unique individuals, they all possess infinite knowledge, infinite vision, perfect conduct, unobstructed bliss, and unlimited energy, and no physical body. Hence from the qualities and attributes points of view all Siddhas are the same.

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Sthiti Bandha (Duration of attachment of karma):

When karmic matter attaches to the soul it remains attached for certain duration before it produces the result. The duration of the attachment is determined according to the intensity or dullness of the soul’s passions or actions when the karma is being attached to the soul. After producing the result, karma will separate from the soul.

Anubhava Bandha or Rasa Bandha (Intensity of attachment of karma):

What fruits the karmic matter will produce are determined at the time of attachment by varying degrees of soul’s passions.

Pradesa Bandha (Quantity of karma):

The intensity or dullness of the soul’s action determines the quantum of karmic matter that is drawn towards the soul for attachment.

Punya (Virtue) and Päp (Sin)

The influx of karmic matter due to good activities of the mind, body, and speech with the potential of producing pleasant sensations is called Punya or virtue. Activities such as offering food, drink, shelter, purifying thought, physical and mental happiness result in producing Punya karma

The influx of karmic matter due to evil activities of the mind, body, and speech with the potential of producing unpleasant sensations is called Paapa or sin. Activities such as violence, untruth, theft, unchastity, attachment to objects, anger, conceit, deceit, lust result in producing Päpa karma

Both Punya and Päpa karma are manifested in the future in ways that the soul perceives as pleasure or pain (reward or punishment).

Samvara (Stoppage of Karma)

The method that stops fresh karma from attaching to the soul is called Samvara. This process is a reverse process of Äsrava. It can be accomplished by constant practice of:

· Right belief

· Observance of vows

· Awareness (Spiritual-alertness)

· Passionless

· Peacefulness

Jain literature explains 57 practical ways a person can stop the influx of karma.

via : www.facebook.com/JainismPhilosophy

 

What do girls look for in a Guy….Decoding a Girl’s mind!!!!


I; just like any other regular guy; embroiled in the intricacies of world, people and relationships sometimes happen to ponder over a mind boggling question which I feel almost all the boys of my age would often think about – What do girls look for in a guy??  This I feel is most often thought or asked question probably only after “Does God exist??” Having said this, here I try to decode what could possibly run in a girl’s mind while choosing a guy for them.

Many of us could think of …Looks, money, Humor, laugh, Kindness, Hotness, Great Hair, Romance, Deep eyes etc. as most appropriate factors for the choice.

Umm…One might feel strange but its not true; well at least not entirely. These are the things girls are attracted to guys in first few encounters, its not necessarily what they are looking for. Every woman has different personality and perception so if one woman may be ready to find a new partner while the one besides may have just gotten out of a relationship and needs to find herself.

Now even if every girl is different but for starters almost all are looking for a friendship factor when they go hunting for guys. They typically someone to make laugh and make comfortable about themselves.

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Attraction
– this has been the most effective initiator of any relationship. Usually it is important for girls to get attracted to boys in first few communicable exchanges. In other words, it is of utmost necessity for guys to be successful in what I would call the “getting her attention” course. Because that is what guys need to do. Unlike men, women have hundreds of suitors approaching them and vying for their attention every day. Sadly guys mostly don’t have the luxury of being able to walk by a woman and have her understand the person they are deep down. Girls are so mysterious that even they can’t understand themselves.                           So yes Attraction mostly comes as a major player in getting girls to at least initiate some level of communication to guys.

No wonder, this concept of Attractiveness also holds true for gals. “What to look for in guys?” apparently changes with how beautiful or attractive the girl is…                                                                                                                                                                                                   Very Beautiful girl knows that everyone wants her. A not-so-beautiful girl knows that she can make a boyfriend if she wants. Others just expects someone to be their boyfriend.

In modern times, everyone has moved towards more practical living so words and emotions like Love and faith have lost some of their sheen.

So what could be factors that significantly holds true in any of the cases??

It’s Security and Bright future!!! Be it financial or moral or any other way. Financial security could differ from initial attractiveness for money in way that financial security is not thing to be flaunted but money could be!!!                                                        A girl needs security. She wants to get rid of one thing that makes her insecure. A guy who has the capability of solving her biggest problems would be the Mr. Perfect for her.

The girls with higher quotient of attractiveness have the biggest insecurity of being poor. Because this is the only thing they lack. They have beauty and any guy in the world would be ready to marry them. So finding a life partner is not a problem for them. Finding a bright guy is.

There is a major section of girls who have simple dreams while thinking of choosing a guy. .They choose the Honesty and Dedication of a guy above any other traits. Of course other things might come along in the package. But yes…this category of girls are the most faithful, loving and unselfish girls as they are more interested in the guy they are with. For them love and faith holds greater place than other worldly factors.

No matter however we perceive or whatever we analyze….no one could answer these problems with an absolute mandate. People and hence their emotions and perceptions continue to evolve…so does the answer to this question!!!

©TARANG JAIN

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Low on Inspiration in Life?? …..Try something Unconventional!!!!

When we usually feel lack of Confidence and hunt for Inspiring words, it’s usually filled with cliché advises – “Don’t give up”, “Get over it” or “Always look on the bright side of life” to name a few..

While they’re all correct at the root, conventional thinking like this just doesn’t work anymore. In fact, they are so trite and used so often that the message is lost to most of us. Its the time that we think some crazy and unconventional ideas to get INSPIRED…

I put a thought and found that following could be few of numerous ideas by which we could motivate ourselves in various spheres of our lives….

  1. Build anticipation-Get Excited!!

 This will sound hard, and many people will skip this tip. But it really works. If you find inspiration and want to do a goal, don’t start right away. Many of us will get excited and want to start today. That’s a mistake. Set a date in the future — a week or two, or even a month — and make that your Start Date. Get excited about that date. Make it the most important date in your  life. In the meantime, start writing out a plan. Because by delaying your start, you are building anticipation, and increasing your focus and energy for your goal.

  1. Post the Goal and HIT IT!!
    Print out your goal in big words. Make your goal just a few words long, like a mantra (“GET FIT –Exercise 15 mins. Daily”), and post it up on your wall or refrigerator. Post it at home and work. You want to have big reminders about your goal, to keep your focus and keep your excitement going. A picture of your goal (like a model with sexy abs, for example) also helps!! 

  2. The Smaller the better…Start small

             Sometimes the Smaller the Better!!!!If you are having a hard time getting started, it may be because you’re thinking too big. If  you want to exercise, for example, you may be thinking that you have to do these intense workouts 5 days a week. No — instead, do small, tiny, baby steps. Just do 2 minutes of exercise.

             REMEMBER…. Baby steps are all what you NEED!!!

  1. Get some Life…..Stop being so damn serious!!!

              Every one of us considers our job, our work as highest priority in life. The truth is; your work doesn’t matter nearly as much as you think it does. Sure, it might be important. People are potentially counting on you. There may be repercussions if you don’t get it done on time.

              But for the love of God, let’s stop acting like if we don’t get it done, our entire self-image and world is going to fall apart.

              Everything we build will eventually fall apart someday. Let’s stop acting as if everything is permanent. Let go. Relax. Create your art. Develop the artist in you!!

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  1. Consume all ideas: 

    New movies, new stories, new political opinions, new theories, without judging. Not personally—you’ll still have preferences and things you believe and don’t believe—but for the sake of what they might inspire. Try reading a genre you’ve never read before (romance novels, the sports section, Fortune magazine, a feminist essay), watching a type of movie you’d never otherwise watch. People start liking or doing things that they have earlier perceived as not their liking.

  1. It’s Time to Groove….Move your body!!

             Yes, seriously. Energy gets stuck in our bodies and our creativity gets stifled when we become rigid and stuck in the same postures.

            Need more ease in your work? Try yoga or dance. Get your energy flowing, but don’t shake it off. Channel it into your work.

  1. Stop Watching the News

    The media has the biggest influence on our society. Unfortunately what I felt lately that they are contributing to the crisis in our world in a negative manner.

    Try and Find your own news, rather, delve into the stories of inspiration and hope in your environment. The saddest aspect about our world is that we focus too much on the negative and not enough on the solutions to change it to positive. Once the media starts contributing to the greater good of our world, we will start to change for the better.

  2. Care to Share!!! Wise men have always said that exchanging thoughts and sharing knowledge is the biggest trait of Mankind. Good ideas from multiple sources could always be merged to form new, better ideas….so why hesitate??Share online and offline. Call your friends and talk about things, share your experiences and hear theirs. Aren’t you inspired yet to share?

Inputs : http://addicted2success.com/ , http://paidtoexist.com/inspiration-vs-motivation/‎ , http://zenhabits.net/

© TARANG JAIN

Birthday Verses…for the friend for Life…!!!

On the special occasion of the Grand Birthday of great friend for life…few lines to show how much you love them and always bless them to be Happy !!!


Now I know why you say — “We are Friends Forever”…
especially bcoz of the bond that you and I possess!
I admire your fun-filled personality
and somehow you never fail to impress….!!

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Having you around
certainly make the world a better place!
I like everything about you…
You are someone I could never replace.

So I will tell you right now exactly what I need to say…
To show you how much I appreciate you being there for me every day!
You’re worth more than anyone; even a million pounds..
Because you always know what to say when I am feeling down!!

I sometimes wish I could explain; how much you mean to me…
But it’s just not possible to list a billion things

So I just wanted to say…
I love you so much!!
I hope you never leave me
and promise to stay in touch….

May you dance among the ribbons
of your birthday balloons…
Smile through the lit candles
and sing to the classic happy tune.
Eat the cake of wishes,
frosted with sweet dreams of parties to come.
Spin among the music and laughter
in your perfect party dress that’s brand new….
And till next year my buddy….
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!! 🙂 🙂

Copyright © TARANG JAIN